Saturday, September 23, 2006
sad
something bad happened in my family last wed morning n i only knew it wen i came home from NS yst night. haiz just feeling very low n sad. hiding e tears and sadness from everyone. i dun really knw wat to do nw.
*life is just sad for me nw
10:55 PM; noMUSIC; noLIFEY
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Dreams
what are dreams really? sometimes the dreams you dreamt will come true, sometimes it won't but how do we know when it will happen. can say it's quite scary as you will have nightmares sometime. can we really predict the future through dreams? most of the time it just a normal daily life event that will happen from dreams. why didn't the happy or sad dreams happen? sometimes i wonder are we living in a world that repeat it self. why are we having this type of dreams and it happening? life just have many interesting things.
*wish that dream today really happen
10:08 PM; noMUSIC; noLIFEY
Last day
today met up wif yd, karen, yp, lian, shan, wei an n miao. for late lunch at swensens i had only a milkshake (thin mint) as i ate at home be i came. after tat went shopping e gals except lian bought stuff from herren. den we ahead down to far east to collect karen shoes which she paid at herren but collect at far east as there was no stock there. after walking awhile wei an n miao went off. den we went to gelare to had a waffer ice cream, 4 ppl yd, shan, lian n me share 1 "large" lol. karen n yp ate 1 "large". den waited for joyce n her bf to come den we head down to scots crystal jade for dinner. first time eating at crystal jade can say e food not bad but not fulling lol. it's kinda ex too service was very gd lol.
after dinner karen n yp left to go pubbing. den e rest of us went down to cine to meet nat n her bro i think (dun really knw his identity) to play LAN game (DOTA) lol. exiciting match it was lol, after tat joyc n her bf wnt home n rest went to park lane to play snooker n pool. snooker match was from normal to dull lol as almost every1 can't hit in e balls execpt the taico queen (nat) haha she really very taico today wack any ball it just go in for snooker n pool. before it gets more dull we change to pool there was when lian become high scream here n there lol.after awhile yd went home, e rest of us continue play till e point my eyes wan close le den anyhw wack le lol played till 2am i think den off we go to take cab home. e 4 of dem share 1 cab n i took 1 myself home.
today outting was alright many ppl came but left early lol long time since had this many ppl outing le dun knw wen will hv this type of outing again haiz. tmr will be going in for training le later need to pack e stuff to bring in, kinda lazy also just no mood to do stuff nw. on the way home many things came to my mind n thinking about my life n hw has it been for e pass few years. i dun knw am i happy or sad wif my life nw anot just tat like no feeling for it le passing by each day just like tat can't really bothered about time n date too.
*wat do i really wan in my life, can't find e goal for it.
*feel tat i getting to lose hope for many things, just feel so empty nw.
*do i really need someone in order to move on in life?
*been having this sad feeling for pass few days, what can i do to over come this feeling
~really need a hug, shoulder to cry on or someone to comfort me~
2:33 AM; noMUSIC; noLIFEY
Saturday, September 16, 2006
2nd last day
2 days more b4 booking into new training area. dun knw how is it going to be like there.
whole day slack again from last sunday till today do nth most of e time rot at home. had to format my com due to a worm which can't be detected by scanners, it eats up the cpu usage till the com lag like hell. only 1 system processor running n it using 100% of cpu useage -.- windows updates nw can really wait very long to update sia spent almost e whole day do it damn slow.
today got an sms from her, she just had a quarrel n was crying. called her up n asked her wat happen den cheer her up by toking about some stuff n fun times. after awhile she stop crying n we continue to tok about food n my posting lol. den she ended the call as she had to go for dinner. at least i knw she will look for me wen she is down, to tok to or to cheer her up.
*things will always happen for a reason
*look at the problems in different views
12:18 AM; noMUSIC; noLIFEY
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
another day
nw adays like very hard to find the right friend(s) to tok about personal things. they just dun gif a tot about how u really feel n wat they say can even hurt u. y r ppl becoming more n more selfish n cold hearted as they grow older. shouldn't they be wiser n more mature in thinking n speaking haiz.
once awhile a person will feel down n need some1 to tok to or to comfort. most ppl i knw take it like the world owe them a living. y can't ppl look things in another way. "what is yours is yours, what is not yours is not yours". i knw you can fight for wat you wan but did any1 think of wat will be the end result after tat n the "cause n effect" tat will affect others n love ones?
life is nv easy but it will be better wen u hv friends n love ones to help u along the way even though they can't be always be there but wat if they can't be there wen u need them? how will you face e problem?
*will have to walk this path alone again, as time will heal wounds but it will never heal all.
*thx you for the beautiful last moments & memories
8:35 PM; noMUSIC; noLIFEY
Sunday, September 10, 2006
A nice story
Jun was veri charming & many girls couldn't help falling in love with him... therefore, he became quite a flirt... As for Jen, she was an ordinary girl with average looks... Although there were quite a number of guys chasing her, Jen only had Jun in her heart...although She knew that one day Jun would eventually leave her... she still continued to love him wholeheartedly... Jen loves rainy days...she
loves playing in the rain, & whenever Jun wanted to join her, she'll always stop him from joining... Jun then ask her: "Why don't yOu let me join you?"
Jen replied:" Err..er..because i don't want you to fall sick... " Jun then ask her again:"If playing in the rain will make me fall sick, then why are you still doing it?" But each time Jen will always keep quiet & smile at him... Although Jun was`t able to join her, he felt happy... To him, as long as Jen was happy, he'll be happy as well... However, nothin last long... Jun soon fell for another girl after two months. He even love the girl more deeply den he love Jen.. One day, while Jun & Jen were having their dinner , Jun told Jen that this would be their last dinner together... Jen looked at him... She knew dat this was going to happen, but she
choose not to ask any further...Jun then requested for a break up.. And Jen...she accepted willingly... partly because, she knew...Jun was just like the wind...never stop at any point... That night..it was to be the last time Jun send Jen home.. Jen kept veri quiet...although deep down she wanted to know the reasons but she choose not to ask... Just when Jen was about to step into the lift, Jun stop her... He said:Jen, I'm really sorry that i've let you down... But i'll never forget those days when i see you playing in the rain...those are the most happy & unforgottable memories i had with you... After listening to Jun, Jen could't help it but cried...
Jun hugged her tightly... He said:Jen, There's one question i wanted to ask you long ago... Why is it everytime when you are playing in the rain, you just wouldn't allow me to accompany you? Jen was stunned.. pausing for a few seconds, Jen replied... Because... Because i don't wish to let you know... I was crying...
EnD
many things came across my mind even though i tried not to think of them. i thought the feelings were gone but they are still there dorment in the heart. the feelings were awaken again from what you said that day. trying my best to stop thinking ever now and then. it really still aches even thought the feelings were very long time ago. how can i really stop this pain...
i know you won't read my blog. maybe by typing out how i really feel now, may help ease the pain i am feeling.
10:25 PM; noMUSIC; noLIFEY
Saturday, September 09, 2006
POP Loh
wed 6 sep
well it been a long time since i update lol. last wed i POP from BMT finally a private le nw can walk n wear cv clothes on e road no need march in TK liao haha. on tat day my parents came to put e cap on my head to mark e end of my bmt. kinda feel sad for some of e guys i knew cos no one came for their POP n only e SGT's or SIR's will put on e cap for dem as i can see e sadness in their eyes.
thur 7 sep
met up wif justin n karen in e afternoon. karen was late as usual lol we went to cine to buy tickets for e show THE HOST den went for lunch karen n i ate yong tou fu as justin ate at home. rush to finish e food den went in cinema to watch e show. e show was alright, after tat we head down to suntech to kbox. sang till 11pm den took cab home shared wif karen.
fri 8 sep
went for ns excursion den met up wif some1 which i owe a meal in e evening since last year lol. we had dinner at genki den walk walk around shopping. bought drinks n head down to esplanade. tok about many things happy n sad. had a wonderful evening yst but dun think it will happen again. really missed e time together as it has been a long time since we ate n sat down together to tok. 11.40pm we took cab home drop her off first den i went home.
waiting for yr ans tat i will nv knw n dun worry i will take care of myself de
11:47 AM; noMUSIC; noLIFEY
